Posts Tagged ‘dysthimia’
Hamstrung
Disjointed, because that’s how I roll. I write these things knowing that people will turn away, but in the hope that some might not. I’ve sat in front of my computer a lot lately. This morning for ten minutes, and then another five, and later on another five. I’ve picked up my phone and opened…
Read MoreRoutines
Two months. You’d be surprised how much change you can pack into two months. I’ve been fairly quiet on the blogging front since we left Canmore, but actually because of a glut of new material rather than a lack thereof. It’s challenging to distill everything that has happened or that I’ve learned, so I’ve decided…
Read MoreAnd then another day
There isn’t much more to it than this, just 24 hours of input and things can go south pretty quick. Words, good or bad, as a trigger. There are as many faces to depression as there are people who suffer it, so what I’m about to write isn’t prescriptive by any means. You need to…
Read MoreA Penny for the Old Guy
I spend a lot of time thinking about impractical stuff. I’m not often losing sleep about what to make for dinner or cleaning my truck, things that would be really useful. For me, thinking is mostly in the clouds, and I’m losing sleep because of it right now. I’ve spent years trying to figure out…
Read MoreConnect the Dots
My normal M.O. isn’t to prattle on about spirituality, but I came across something last night that caught my attention. I’ve been thumbing through a book titled We’re All Doing Time, written in the 90’s I think by a guy trying to help prisoners find spirituality. His emphasis is mostly eastern meditative practice, but he…
Read MoreThe Shakes
Some days I live without framework, without structure, in a world where the laws of physics and matter have no hold. I see buildings melting into people on the street, music intertwined with the frantic and nervous tapping of my heel on the floor. My thinking isn’t there, my mind is weak, my heart washes…
Read MoreSucked In
“Just snap out of it!” I woke up this morning on the verge of a bad day. I spent the night sleepless and woke groggy after hitting snooze a bunch of times. Raising the blinds and looking through frozen crystals in the sky it was obvious we’re in a deep freeze again. Not even the…
Read More20 More Minutes, revisited
I said it wouldn’t be easy, didn’t I? Just 20 minutes a day. It’s so simple, but its been days since I’ve managed to make myself hive off the time. Dropping the practice is both symptom and cause, and it spirals downward until a certain, dark point where I just give up. But it’s dawned…
Read MoreAs Punk As
In a lot of ways this has just started, but in others it’s been going on a hell of a long time. There are aspects of my personality that put me at odds with a lot of things. I grew up being kind of a little shit, a mouthy know-it-all (I still know it all…)…
Read MoreIt’s There
If there is one aspect of being me that sucks, it’s the unreliable nature of my strengths. When I am strong, I have incredible fortitude. And when I am able to focus, I’m afforded great insight. But if depression is one thing, it’s fickle. I can have long periods of productivity; weeks running or riding…
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